I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
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