Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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