How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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