Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
