we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
