one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
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