You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
