My room smells like vodka and shame
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
