dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Randomize
