Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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