Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Randomize
