Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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