Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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