I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
