And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
splinters make it hard to masturbate
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Randomize
