yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
