Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
As shirtless as possible
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
