The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
whose parrot is this?
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
