I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
