I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
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