I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Randomize
