I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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