just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
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