ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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