i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Of course I have a pirate flag
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
