is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I think a kid would responsible me up
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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