so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
