I heard we made out
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
