And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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