i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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