No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
