I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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