party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I met the friendliest cop last night
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
