tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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