i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
i've created a new STD.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Randomize
