VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Randomize
