Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize