I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
