Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I want her autograph on my taint
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
