I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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