My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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