i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
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