dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Randomize
