Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Randomize