I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
