So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Randomize