Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize