'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
