and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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