Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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