this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
